I feel like I have a case of the Naomi Campbells

So OCD overtook me this weekend.  Not sure why just lately I have felt the need to clean and organize.  I am usually able to control these crazy obsessions I have but I think I am just so stressed out lately that I don’t have the effort to try and control them anymore.  For example, Thanksgiving is coming up and seeing as how I love to cook and bake I have decided even though my Aunt is hosting dinner this year, I have taken it upon myself to offer up dessert appetizers pasta and hell why not handle brining and prepping the turkey too.  Now I will stress that I personally asked to do this.  How does this all time in to the case of crazies I have, well I spent a good chunk of yesterday creating an excel spreadsheet to figure out ingredients how much for what and in total, prep times as well as cooking temps and times.  Yes... I created a SPREAD SHEET.  Most normal people would I dunno write shit down on a piece of paper I decided Microsoft office would be much more efficient.  

So since I spent too much time on a ridiculous task trying to make it perfect yesterday, all my errands I wanted to run got pushed off to today.  And of course just my luck plans had to be changed.  Instead of going out and coming back in time for dinner with my sis and pat coming over later, they decided to come early in the day which kinda throws off schedule times.  Usually I would not care are all, however once I realized my schedule was thrown off I was irritated, not at her at all.  I love her and honestly just being around her calms me down when I get in modes like this.  So I was cool calm and collected when she was here and then a little after 1:30 they get ready to go.  So once they leave compulsion sets in and I have lists in hand purse and keys and I am out the door!   First stop Bed Bath and Beyond. 

I needed a new humidifier, I know exactly which one I want and need I just need to get in pick it up and peace out.  Now I go to the one closest to my house since I didn’t want to drive 20 min out for the same store... first bad decision of the day.  This Bed Bath and Beyond (b3 as they like to call themselves) appears to have been laid out by an epileptic monkey.  Nothing makes sense and it is laid out all crazy as irons are next to pots and shit.  So I am looking and looking, I still have yet to find the fucking humidifiers... finally after walking the loop twice I go over to customer service to ask and right next to it... there they are... why randomly in a shitty nook I have no idea.  I didn’t realize the slap chop was a more popular item during the winter than electric heaters and humidifiers, but then again what the fuck do I know!?  So I finally find the one I want and pick up the better looking of the two boxes.  Now at the register the cashier decides he needs to flirt with me... no.  Finally the total comes up and I pull out cash.  Now this is b-day money that I have had sitting in my room that I just have been too lazy to get to the bank and deposit yet.  So I count it all out and considering the amount it was quite a bit of cash to be carrying and the cashier decides to say 'well what does your family do?  Are they into waste management?'.  WTF!? Just because I am paying this amount in cash you are going to jump to a stupid conclusion like that, as I am holding my keys I wanted to just throw them at his stupid face as hard as possible at that moment, exhibit A of the Naomis.

So I run the rest of my errands and lastly end up at whole foods which as much as I complain about how expensive it can be, it really isn’t that bad and I love just putzing around in there.  So I finally get all my stuff together and I can't seem to find juniper berries so the logical option in my mind is I ask someone for help.  They lead me back to the spices which at this point due to my OCD I have already checked every single bottle by picking it up reading it and making sure all labels are facing out when I put them back (yeah its that intense).  Anyway I am telling him I have checked all the spices they aren’t there I was just wondering if they would be somewhere else as in is there a special 'Thanksgiving' display that they have been moved to, in which he replies 'no most people just don’t see what they want cause they are rushed and don’t take the time to look' in a snotty tone, and by the way they weren't there.  I had to resist the urge to chuck my cell phone at this asshats-face.  

Fast forward to going home eating dinner cleaning up and deciding I need to go set up my new humidifier in my room. So I open the box and what do I find... a box that looks like it has been a disguised return item.  Why am I saying this, well the cord was all loosy goosy and oh wait the thing itself was all scratched up, annnd a piece was BROKEN and the plastic around it was blatantly ripped almost chewed open.  Clearly someone returned it and they just put it right back on the shelf for someone else to purchase.  Considering how much I paid for it, I was furious.  This is when I wanted to drive back to wack ass B3... and throw the effing box at the building... however couldn’t since it was conveniently closed... see pictures below of my Naomi trigger from Bed Bath and Shitty.  And no worries they will hear and see my wrath tomorrow, I have no time for this ridiculousness.  I told my mom and then showed her and she just kinda said 'I am sorry for whoever is working at the counter tomorrow'  I tend to have a reputation of making customer service people cry (I do apologize.. well most of the time), lets hope you don’t see me on the news cause I was arrested for verbal abuse or something.  HP actually would immediately refer me to a manager when I would call.  I will fill you all in on that endeavor tomorrow.  I am also sure I will have some fun and festive train story as well!